I hear from parents on a regular basis, 'It's the strangest thing, he will do his homework but he forgets to turn it in.'  Well I'm not saying the homework wasn't started, or the assignment wasn't considered, but I hold tight to the belief that the homework was NOT completed.  Of course you want to believe your child and of course your child had good intentions, but this doesn't mean he/she actually completed the assignment.

I have the luxury of stating this bold of a comment because I have yet to hear a teen tell me I'm wrong or, when their parents have left my office, not fess up to the incomplete of the assignment.  My quetion is, 'Did you often do your homework and not turn it in?'  I ask this of parents because it isn't a behavior I am familiar with... are you?  If you answer this honestly, I feel confident the answer will be no.  So, this leads me to ask, 'Why do you think your son/daughter would have this type of behavior?'

It is easy for a teen to say, 'Oh I forgot to turn in my assignment.'  Ok, if this is a one time occurance, then it is what it is.  But if this is the consistent reason for late, past-due assignments then there is a problem.  The problem is that your teen isn't doing his/her homework, not that they have ADHD, memory issues, a high level of stress, too much to do, and every other excuse parents are providing for not holding their teen accountable. 

Teens will meet your expectations, although you must have them and hold them high for a teen to truly strive.  My teenagers I meet with are often surprised at how gullible their parents are and often say, 'Oh my parents don't care about that stuff.'  The parents I meet care deeply and are doing their best to be trusting in their teenager, this isn't something you want to let go of... but it is your job to be the parent and occassionally push even when you aren't sure if you are doing the right thing.  Teens want to trust you and respect you, give them a reason to do both.

Teens will say they didn't turn in their homework, parental translation of this is 'Your child didn't complete his homework.'